10. Picking their nose and eating it. No biggie, every kid considers this a delicacy...unless they're partial to the convenience of the liquid form running down their philtrum (the space between the nose and upper lip - I googled it)...which I know absolutely nothing about.
9. Dipping their head in the toilet. At least it hadn't been used.
8. Drinking Act liquid fluoride. For this one we called Poison Control.
7. Sucking on their toes after running on a blacktop driveway. Which is not much different than when I caught them chewing on and/or licking the bottom of their shoes.
6. Licking the mirror at the play area in the mall like an ice cream cone. Two of them were doing this simultaneously. Other kids began to join in...or maybe they copied other kids. Either way, it was great fun!
5. Brushing their teeth with a toothbrush they found in the trash.
4. Pooping in the guest bathroom sink. Ok, that one was done by the cat, but it was still one of the grossest things I've caught a "member" of our family doing.
3. Putting their hand in a public toilet, before and after they had used it. Then laying on the public bathroom floor and rubbing all over it like they were making snow angels.
And the #1 Grossest Thing I've Caught My Kids Doing (this one made it in our 2009 Christmas letter): Emptying the trash can full of trash into the tub, along with a used diaper and a full roll of toilet paper, then filling the trash can with water from the toilet and dumping it in the tub and splashing around in it...naked of course...because it was a "bath".
I know I've heard of other gross stories from parents. What gross thing have you caught your child doing?
The grossest thing my kids did was poop in the bathtub and throw up in my mouth. -Tammy F.
ReplyDeleteNathaniel and I laughed out loud at these!! :) it was great to meet Autumn and see you guys at the wedding!!!
ReplyDeleteThe grossest thing we've caught the oldest one doing is painting the walls with her poop. My husband asked her where she got her "paint" and she stuck her hand in her diaper and pulled out a handful of new "art"...
ReplyDeleteThe grossest thing we've caught the middle one doing is eating her snot and boogers, not too bad, except that she was really sick and the mucus was NOT clear...
The grossest thing we've caught the little one doing is...well, she's only 2 months old, so she's got time...
The first one you mentioned almost happened yesterday. We caught her before she started painting.
DeleteSICK-SICK-I'm bringing my 40 FL OZ germ-x Hand Sanitizer when I stay with you after the reunion. love mom
ReplyDeleteOne of our new little five yr olds thinks randomly blowing her nose without a tissue, just forcing snot to fly down her face and wherever else it happens to go is hilarious! I have a feeling that will pale in comparision to what lies ahead though!
ReplyDeleteWe'll have to.get together when we get back. You can sit back and enjoy how far you've come as we figure it out. :)
I am TOTALLY laughing my butt off about now! I'm sure I don't want to know what the grossest things my kids have done! But I'm sure they will eventually come out when they feel they are well outside the statutes of limitations. LOL Too funny!
ReplyDeleteThe sad thing is that some of these I've caught them doing multiple times!
DeleteUmm... laughing hysterically right now! Picking your nose and eating it, that's small stuff. The last one?? Wow, seriously, I have no words. My boys are only 2 and 5 though, they have lots of time come up with new gross adventures :)
ReplyDeleteSo, gross stuff my boys have done... hmmm. Well, they are both bogey eaters, although the littlest has a long way to catch up to big bro - he's a bit of a pro. It's worse when they have runny noses cos they drag that goo straight down into their mouth like it's some sort of dip. I've caught my eldest using a carrot to dig stuff outta there! One time I caught the eldest (when he was much younger) chewing on a piece of dog turd like it was a Cuban cigar.... the memory makes me shudder. Our littlest has been a potty prowler since as long as I can remember. I have to make sure to get rid of the doo doo ASAP, otherwise he's in there straight away.. I'm sure there's more. Boys! I'm about to have a girl - so soon I'll know just how disgusting the girls can be also!!!! great post:)
ReplyDeleteOMG! The dog turd would have thrown me over the edge. That would have been my #1. omg.
ReplyDeleteGeez I have a few licking everything (the dog, the floor, the back door, cart handles), sticking his hand in the toilet, sticking his head in the trash can (and it smelled horrible), playing in his poopie diaper, playing in the cat litter box, picking up a piece of dog crap while we were outside. Gag. Boys are gross. :)
ReplyDeletewww.adventureswithcaptaindestructo.com
Awesome. Things to look forward to. I just have an 11 month old, and I thought the fact that she is always trying to eat dog fur off the floor was bad, but it looks like there's a lot more grossness in our future!
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOD. I am horrified. That reminds me— I have to take out the trash. I think I might start doing this several times a day.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by Super Sunday Sync!
ReplyDeletewww.dawnsdisaster.blogspot.com
LOL That is hilarious! I love your number 1 - I just can't even imagine it. I can't think offhand of anything with my kids but my mother-in-law always used to regale us with the story of how my hubby's older brother took off his diaper when he was in his crib and painted the wall with his poop. Ewwww....
ReplyDeleteI'm stopping by from the Super Sunday Sync - I already follow you. Just saying hi and letting you know about our Book Giveaway for Charity that we are currently hosting, in case you hadn't seen it.
Cheers,
Renee
http://motherdaughterbookreviews.com/book-giveaway-for-charity-help-support-the-cure-jm-foundation/
OMG. That's grody to the MAX! I would have some serious issues with that - or a really good blog post - preferably NOT with pictures.
ReplyDeletehaha I can't wait to have kids, now! I came from ThoughtsFromParis...so glad I'm not alone in my gross habit. When I taught first grade, I was holding one of our daily story times at the carpet, and one girl in front of me picked the biggest, juiciest booger that twinkled on her finger. I watched her admire it, then plunk it into her mouth. I started gagging right there and then, while simultaneously trying to keep the flow of the story. My eyes were watering from holding back my gags, but darn it if I didn't get through that story!
ReplyDeleteOh my! #4 had me rolling! Damn cats! Your kids are pretty gross too. I can't think of anything worse than the things in your list. All 3 have, at some point, painted with poo or rolled around on a public bathroom floor like it was going out of style. . . But a trash bath? That's hysterical!
ReplyDeleteI just found you today through ThoughtsFromParis, but I think I love you already. If I keep finding awesome posts to read, I'm never going to accomplish anything on my own blog. Which would actually be sad if anyone read it. . .
I have a feeling I'm going to be distracted for awhile.
Im reading it! Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI knew I shouldn't have read this. Ew. I think I'm gonna puke. Kids are gross. :D
ReplyDeleteTell me about it! Sickos!
ReplyDeleteOMG I couldn't top anything on your list. Blah!!1 #2 alone might have caused me to call a Taxi and check in to a hotel to get cleaned and burn the belongings. LOL!
ReplyDeleteLOL again. I didn't remember the mom disclaimer in the title. That's funny too. TALU
ReplyDeleteI also like the mom disclaimer, and I can't think of anything that beats your list either, although I have caught all of mine engaging in #10. My dog eats the cat poop outside. The vet told me to have the cats drink pineapple juice, because that would make their poop taste bad. My husband had a great question: "Doesn't it taste bad already?"! TALU ;)
ReplyDeleteI find myself at a loss for words with this one LOL. I'm sorry is all that comes to mind. ;)
ReplyDeleteOMG I'm so glad you linked this in TALU because I've never read it (well duh, I only started blogging in September and you have thousands of old posts). I can't believe they did that to their bathwater. Ew. And my son loves licking mirrors, too. No matter where they are. Often, they seem to be in elevators. He also has no problem picking up his food from the ground and putting it in his mouth. And feeling his butt for poop. Lovely.
ReplyDeleteI found you through TALU, but I have nothing to add. Thanks, though, for letting me know I'm not alone because my kids have done #3 (the snow angel part) before. And, of course, #10's quite popular; the worse is when they offer it to me as a delicacy--no thanks.
ReplyDeleteOh my lord. you win! Bless you. hahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteDear lord, how can anyone top that list?? The licking the mirror thing they've done a dozen times, but if they work up to your #1, I may just pass out. Thanks for sharing on TALU!
ReplyDelete